Ahad, September 14, 2008

Hati Itu Ada Banyak Pintu

“Saya dengan dia dah 4 tahun bang Tapi kami ni asyik bergaduh. Bila gaduh dia mesti tinggikan suara, tengking-tengking saya. Saya selalu cakap, dalam perhubungan ni mesti ada masalah. Tapi kita boleh bincang baik-baik, bincang cara dewasa. Bila saya cakap macam tu dia letakkan telefon. Lepas tu saya akan call dia balik. Biarpun bukan salah saya jadi punca pergaduhan, everytime saya pula kena minta maaf dengan dia,” keluh rakan lelaki berusia 28 tahun.

Adat orang muda bercinta, bisik hati saya.

“Macam ni la. Awak masih ada banyak masa. So, cuba tengok balik, analisa, selama bercinta tu banyak bahagia ke atau banyak derita. Orang bercinta ni tujuan sebenarnya nak mencari kebahagian tapi kalau asyik bergaduh, itu mengundang derita namanya,” komen saya.

Dia mendiamkan diri, mungkin berfikir.

“Saya faham, bukan senang nak tinggalkan girlfriend kalau dah 4 tahun bersama. Memang susah nak melupakan especially semua saat manis dilalui. Tapi fikirkan balik. Awak sebenarnya ada pilihan. Hati manusia ni bagi saya ada banyak pintu. Sekarang ni awak hanya buka satu pintu untuk girlfriend awak dan tutup pintu selebihnya. Sedangkan entah-entah ramai lagi perempuan cuba mengetuk pintu lain, nak menjengah, kalau awak benarkan”

Dia mendengar khusyuk.

“Awak sanggup derita, kena marah, tidak dihormati, tortured, memendam rasa. Saya simpati, sampai muka handsome nampak muram,” usik saya.

“Betul tu bang,” sampuk rakannya lebih muda duduk di sebelah.

“Jujur cakaplah, ada tak perempuan lain, ketuk pintu dalam hati awak tu?,” soal saya.

“Ada,” jawabnya ringkas diikuti hilai tawa gembira.

“Bagus. Kalau macam tu bukalah pintu tu. Izinkan dia menjengah. Bukan nak suruh masuk teruspun. At least kalau ada dua, awak boleh membuat perbandingan, basis of comparison. Tengok mana satu lebih baik dari segi sikap dan peribadi. Mana satu lebih menghormati, boleh diajak berbincang setiap kali timbul masalah, bukan jenis menengking ikut emosi. Tak salahpun sebab awak bukannya dah kahwin, masih bujang, still ada hak memilih”

“Betul kata abang tu,” terukir senyuman di bibirnya.

“Kalau the second one is better, why should you stick to the first one?,” soalan penting saya lontarkan.

“Selama ni dengan the second one tu, saya sekadar kawan. Saya bagi tahu dia, saya ada girlfriend. Tapi asyik bergaduh,” balasnya.

“Ha! Itu tak bagus. Sebab kalau boleh jangan sesekali burukkan girlfriend sendiri dengan perempuan lain awak suka. Nanti nampak awak meraih simpati. What you should do is, kalau dia suka kat awak, nilai keduanya secara berasingan, independently. Biar adil,” respon saya.

“Kita orang dah lama cakap kat dia bang. Tapi ..,” celah rakannya seorang lagi.

“Dia degilkan?,” soal saya.

Mereka bertiga tersenyum.

“Katalah, lepas kenal lebih rapat, awak tengok the second one lebih bagus dan dia ada potensi jadi kekasih, percayalah, time tu kalau girlfriend awak sekarang ni mengamuk, mesti awak tak stress sebab dah ada 'back up' tempat menggantung harapan. So, tak ada hal la sangat nak tinggalkan girlfriend awak tu. Awak takkan frust. She might deserve someone else, not you. Macam tu juga awak. Kalau dah bertunang, kahwin, baru nak buat pilihan, itu dah terlambat sebab nanti babitkan kes putus tunang, cerai berai, payah,” ujar saya.

“Ok bang,” katanya.

Kekadang orang bujang samada lelaki atau perempuan terlupa. Tiada ikatan sah dengan kekasih, tiada tanggungjawab. Maksudnya, mereka masih berhak memilih pasangan terbaik bakal menempuh kehidupan bersama hingga ke akhir hayat dalam alam rumahtangga. Jangan ‘disimpan’ kekasih bagai api dalam sekam, bimbang nanti membakar diri di kemudian hari.

[ Kata Mazidul: Saya di Kota Bharu, Kelantan ]

11 ulasan:

  1. Perempuan yg baik adalah untuk lelaki yg baik. Begitulah sebaliknyeeee. Kalo ada problem tu adatlah. Kalo nak sedap je,,,baik jgn jadi org. Kan ke kita diberikan hak utk membuat pilihan. Nape nk pening2kn kpala. Cuma bila dah ada tu....syukurlah dgn apa yg dimiliki, jgn mengintai hak org kerana itu hanya akan meranakan diri sendiri.

    BalasPadam
  2. he...23x tetapi ade jugak yang xsedar ek...baru couple dh start berlagak cam suami isteri.. ke hulu ke hilir..gaduh plk pingan, pintu, hp sume berbunyi... belum kes kuar malm xinform n kuar dgn mbe berlainan jantina... start la mintak cerai (putus)

    p/s- nampak gaya cari len la ek...bila pasang byk plk..dorg ckp kite xsetia la..xsyg dorg la..(masalahnya kita nk syg maa depan kita je-xnk la derita sebab die kan)

    BalasPadam
  3. betul kata arryani...fight is unavoidable....and getting into a fight is one of the way that we can learn something from each other...but if it is a continuous fight...i dont think that is wise...bersyukur memang bersyukur...suka,sayang,minat dan cinta adalah 4 benda yang berlainan cik arryani...kepada belibuy,kalau kita sentiasa nak cari yang baru jer kalau ada masalah...saya rasa itu tidak adil...perempuan bukan macam baju...mereka ada hati dan perasaan macam lelaki..saya minta maaf berkata sedemikian...adik beradik saya semua perempuan...saya tunggal lelaki.. kepada saudara tuh...bawak bawak laa dengar cakap orang...atau baca laa blog nie 10 kali...

    BalasPadam
  4. Bersikap telus adalah lebih baik..skang x kawin lagi dah over..bila dah kawin..bosan! What's that? Cerai cam biasa je skang..Org skang dah x ble pk waras.....kurang pengetahuan agama...ikut sesedap rasa!

    BalasPadam
  5. Sdr/i, saya percaya pada dasar, setiap kita punyai pilihan. Kita selam ini mungkin tersikap pilih.Tetapi gentar untuk berundur atas pelbagai faktor. Biarlah kita berduka buat seketika, asalkan bahagia di kemudian hari. Semoga dia juga bahagia sekali biarpun bukan bersama dengan kita sebagai pasangan hidup, suami atau isteri ..

    BalasPadam
  6. belum kawen dh gado2,maka lepas kawen apatah lagi..

    samala gak klu belum kawen dah 'nikah',justeru ape lg yg tnggl slps kawen?

    buat pilihan yg bijak.jgn hny pilih lelaki/prmpuan yg lawa je.byk sgt yg pelu kita teliti sblm pilih sumone tu..but that doesnt mean yg kite kene cari sumone yg perfect..tp kite kene cari sumone yg akn berusaha utk jd lbh baik,sbb perkahwinan ni adlh satu usaha ke arh kebahagiaan yg takkan habis smpai bila2...akn ade dugaan yg dtg,maka di situ perlunya usaha kedua-dua pihak utk mnyelesaiknnya..

    nasihat sy pd lelaki tu,:
    jgn pilih sumone utk mnjd isteri kamu,tp pilihla sumone utk mnjdi ibu kpd anak2 kamu..

    ~~nsihat sorg remaja yg x penah ade experience lg..haha..tibai sajalah..

    BalasPadam
  7. ove..i guess everyone is familiar with the word love..but what is love actually to you?what do u understand from the word love?
    Are your palms sweaty, is your heart racing and is your voice caught within your chest? it isnt love..it's like..
    Are you there because it's what everyone wants?
    It isn't love, it's loyalty. Do you stay for their confessions of love, because you don't want to hurt them? It isn't love, it's pity.
    Do you tell them every day they are the only one you think of? It isn't love, it's a lie.i can go all the way just to open up ur mind..NO and NO..i'm not an expert in this..if i am one. then i wont be in this state of mind rite now.. so what is love? my opinion about love..love is just a mysterious phenomena that no one can actually explain it..well..there is sumthing that we can say about love..such as..Do their eyes see your true heart, and touch your soul so deeply it hurts? Then it's love.
    Do you stay because a blinding, incomprehensible mix of pain and elation pulls you close and holds you there?
    Then it's love.Would you allow them to leave you , not because they want to but because they have to? Then its love. Would you give them your heart, your life, your death? Then it's love.i may be wrong in what i just type out..forgive me dear readers.. Now, if love is painful, and tortures us so, why do we love? Why is it all we search for in life? This pain, this agony? Why is it all we long for? This torture, this powerful death of self?
    Why? The answer is so simple cause it's...LOVE. Even people who are not having it wish to experience and share it with..pretty weird aigh..sumthing to ponder on again.. love is not only about or towards sumone else..love is about everything in ur daily life..i just found out that a workaholic actually is not a workaholic..but sumone that is just so in love with their work..believe it or not.. a simple word..4 alphabets..but it means the whole world to you..it can make u smile and laugh to urself..when others think that ur crazy..u just dont care what others will say..coz the feeling is just so beautiful..but it can also crush u to certain extend that some people cant take the pain will commit suicide..why?is it because of love? or is it because of him/her?no matter how u try to put it..the word love is there..again..pardon my words through out this msg..i have no intention to offend anyone..just trying to make people see or think better what is love.. and no and no again..i am no expert in this..just a few lines that i pick up sum where and few thoughts of life that maybe can make u ppl see things differently..dont abuse love..cherish it well..take care of it for it will take good care of u..believe in ur love..stay strong and dont give up in what ur fighting for if u think its worth it..thank u for taking ur time in reading this msg..till we meet again..take care and happy days people..

    p/s - ditulis pada 27 Februari 2007...saja nak berkongsi...

    BalasPadam
  8. maybe god will give us way to finalize our needs as now the doors are still open.. dun juz grab it,juz peep in to it,manalah tau...

    BalasPadam
  9. Dear Nik,

    i'm impressed. u can write as gud as mazidul. Guess life and love has been too hard on you .. just b strong k.

    Trust me, i know exactly how u feel.

    BalasPadam
  10. hai shira....heheheh..nice to meet u tho...tapi sekejap sangat..tak sempat nak get to know more...anyhoo..write as good as mazidul? NO way...he is a writer and a good one indeed (bukan nak memuji yer..tapi kebenaran) i just express what i feel inside..thats all...and at this point..i think i just wanna fight to the end..i wanna see how far i can go...so that i dont regret at the end of the day that i've done my best in each and every way in order to sustain the r'ship, kepada abg mazidul.."dari lima bintang..mana kau letak dia?...2 jer bang...tapi ada yang 4 bintang yang dok mengetuk hati..." at this point...i think i'll stick to that 2 star and fight to the end till there is nuthing more to fight about...tq so much for abg mazidul's wise word and advise...it somewhat open up my mind in a different way..in a way that i can never think off...and thank you shira..

    BalasPadam
  11. agaknya sebab tu laa lelaki suka kwn ngn ramai perempuan. satu sebab-for comparison.

    BalasPadam

Anda bertanggungjawab terhadap komen dicatatkan di entri ini. Setiap komen akan ditapis terlebih dahulu.